“You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.” – Winston Churchill
It seems like there are so many things people do in life anymore just to gain someone’s approval or to impress them. From the meatheads trying to pick up girls in the gym to a student trying to become a lawyer or physician to make their family proud, we are always trying to gain someone’s approval in order to make ourselves feel happier about ourselves. So what happens when we fail to get someone’s approval? We get depressed, we start to feel like a loser, we try harder, we still don’t get the approval we seek, we feel self-conscious, we start to wonder what we’re doing wrong, we then practically start begging for it, we…
You get the point.
So why do we constantly seek to impress others? Perhaps it’s because at times we look at all our problems and stresses in life and can only see the negative aspects that lead to these difficulties. We are after all our own biggest critic. We start to look at all our downsides and things we don’t like about ourselves and may never take a step back to think about all the great things we have accomplished in life. Ok, so maybe stepping out of your comfort zone and talking to a group of people or starting a new exercise program may not look all that impressive to someone else, but if it’s a big deal to you then it is in fact a big deal.
I’m going to give you some advice that we have all heard a million times before that I have learned is a lot more powerful statement than it is given credit for: what other people think of you doesn’t matter. We are lead to believe in today’s society that how you look matters, or how much money you make determines if you’re successful, but when it comes down to it what other people think about you will never truly make you happy. Other’s approval may provide a temporary feeling of accomplishment, but the bottom line is that only we can determine what we consider is a worthwhile accomplishment in life. Human beings in general are capable of doing some amazing things in life so impress yourself with doing something you never thought you would ever have the talent or mindset for. Impressing yourself is perhaps one of the biggest confidence boosters you can give yourself too.
So what maybe the girl you like doesn’t think you’re that impressive. If she can’t see how hard you worked towards your goals then she doesn’t deserve you making her happy anyway. So what your parents might think your career choice isn’t as successful as others. If you wake up every morning and can’t wait to go to work then you have the most successful job on the entire planet. We at times let other people cloud our judgement of what success and happiness truly is, and fail to realize that this definition differs person to person. That’s why some people may not value your accomplishments as much as you do. Their idea of how to be successful is probably significantly different compared to yours. An area you may struggle in may also be an area they excel in so it’s hard for them to grasp the idea that your accomplishment is actually a big deal.
So don’t worry about if someone isn’t impressed by one of your achievements. If they truly care and understand you then they will know how big of a deal this is to you. If not then great! They don’t matter, nor does their opinion matter. Now you know you don’t have to try and impress them anymore because they’re not worth impressing. Surround yourself with people who truly care for and understand you and you won’t ever have to worry about impressing them. Work on impressing yourself first then these people will show up in your life before you know it. It’s a lot harder and more rewarding of a job impressing yourself than it is impressing anyone else.
So keep on working towards those goals to show that little voice in your head just how awesome of a person you are, and feel free to share any personal accomplishments you are proud of the most in the comments below.
Good luck and I hope this made you smile!